I don't play games

I don't like games. Board games, computer games, card games, games of any kind, I don't like them.

In my young teens I played Monopoly with the boy next door a few times. He was much better at it than I was, so I thought. Then I discovered he was cheating, so that was the end of that. I never played another board game in my life.

My wife offered to teach me to play poker. Nice offer, but I’m not interested. I can see myself playing poker just as much as I think I will ride a motorcycle or go skydiving, it’s very unlikely.

I have had a computer for about 35 years now, and I installed a game just once. In the early 1990's I had a simple shooting game. With the mouse I could move around a spaceship, and while trying to avoid being hit by warrior craft, a click on the left button would send a laser beam that could take out one of those enemy ships. It was pretty cool then, extremely primitive by today’s standards.

I think I played that game for maybe 2 hours total, and then I deleted it. I never considered playing another computer game again. No matter how sophisticated and challenging they are, I don't care.

To me it is just a waste of time and it serves no purpose. A lot of people say that they play to relax, but for many of them it becomes an obsession. For hours and hours, they are heating up the keyboard and handle controls like their life is depending on winning a silly game.

Spending a ton of money on the latest and greatest machine, with never ending upgrades, seems like a waste as well. More than once I saw an ad by someone trying to sell an almost new gaming computer because he, or she, needed the money to pay the rent. Not such a good investment I should say.

So next time you see me, don't invite me to play a game. I won't, no exceptions.